Freeman Brothers was first established as a funeral director in Horsham, West Sussex, in 1855. The company now has three further offices – in Billingshurst, Crawley and Hurstpierpoint – and incorporates the sixth generation of the Freeman family working within the business. The COVID-19 pandemic, which began in 2020, is not the first that the organisation has witnessed, but it was a new experience for the current generation of employees. Manager, Abi Pattenden, was in charge of operations throughout, and reflects here on lessons learned…
It seems hard to believe that the COVID-19 pandemic began five years ago. One of the biggest challenges of my working life, it was difficult both to work and lead the team through. Reflecting on it, I can see positives, but I can also see how some of the decisions that were made for us were unhelpful, and hope that lessons have been learned.
One of my main recollections is that I was always worried. Some of the concerns were practical – such as whether funeral staff would be designated as ‘key workers’: important at the outset to ensure employees’ children could go to school so they could come to work. Worries about stocks of PPE and other necessities such as coffins were unfounded, as our practice of high stock levels saw us in good stead. However, many of my concerns ran at a deeper level. I was worried about the team’s wellbeing- especially those in Funeral Operations who were unable to carry out their work at social distance and were in close proximity to people who had died of COVID. There was a period of time when we didn’t know if COVID was dangerous after death, which meant that any handling of a body could have been a threat. While I had always been Health and Safety-conscious, I found there was a lack of consistent guidance on how to keep death care professionals safe and I was fearful that someone in the team would contract COVID and either pass it onto their colleagues, leading to a domino effect in the workforce, or take it home to their families. Many of the team had young children, some lived with elderly or vulnerable relatives and, while I knew I was doing everything I could to protect them, the nature of what we were facing felt unknown.
I remember many frustrations – things changed frequently and what was allowed could alter from one day to the next. Before national guidance was implemented a few weeks in, It was usual to get at least one email from each service venue a day with a change to processes. We had always prided ourselves on being proactive but we couldn’t inform everyone of everything and just had to tell customers that we would ensure they knew what they could and couldn’t do. Most people were understanding, but not everyone- I remember the day I rang 17 different clients to tell them that they couldn’t have the limousine(s) they had wanted as being one when a few people were disappointed.
Later, it was inconsistencies that caused issues. Places of Worship were able to open for regular services before they were for funerals – churchgoers couldn’t understand how they could attend a service of 50 plus people but only be allowed a small number of attendees at a funeral in the same place. I remember one particular funeral with a very small allowed attendance (not even encompassing the deceased person’s immediate family) taking place on the same day as a trial event of reopening hospitality – thousands of people in one nightclub.
There are things that I hope would be done differently in a future pandemic. In Wales, funeral venues were allowed to accommodate whatever quantity of people who could social distance, rather than there being limits on attendees. This feels more sensible than imposing arbitrary limits. I also feel that not enough was done by legislators to understand different communities’ needs around contact with the body after death – rituals such as washing, dressing, and having the body at home were difficult or impossible at times. Much as ‘home schooling’ and ‘work from home’ rules made assumptions about the nature of families which were inconsistent with the experience of many today, some of the restrictions around funeral rites were based on ‘Church of England’-style preferences which didn’t account for broader requirements. I know there will be families who believe their loved ones do not have the afterlife they should, because of their inability to complete the required post-death rites needed to ensure this and I find that very upsetting.
On a positive note, we learned things from the pandemic that we have retained since. Customers were open to communicate via a range of means including online meeting tools so we have kept this as an option. To limit appointment durations, we sent Applicants a questionnaire to complete in advance so we knew what their requirements were. This was found to be so helpful that we are still sending a version of it to help people understand what decisions need to be made.
I think many people now have a better knowledge of what Funeral Directors do.
Much like weddings, I think more people now feel empowered to have a more intimate funeral service if they feel that’s right for them. Many people who arranged a smaller funeral during the pandemic were surprised to find they preferred it to something large, which they found, in comparison, had come with a lot of pressure or been overwhelming. Many people also liked not having a reception afterwards, feeling that the post-service socialising was something that they hadn’t enjoyed in any case. This re-emphasis on doing what is wanted, rather than expected, can only be positive for bereaved people.
